THE MAJOR’S LIFE BLOG

It’s the most anticipated blog entry of the week. This is how we roll on a Tuesday night in Homestead Florida !

1.  George Carlin died over the weekend at the age of 71. While I didn’t agree with virtually all of his political viewpoints (as he identified them in public) he was still one of the greatest and funniest comedians in American history as far as I’m concerned. I will miss his LIVE HBO specials every few years.

2.  I ate Chinese Food for Lunch today. I picked it up from Shanghai & Tokyo in Homestead’s Waterstone Plaza. I’m a semi-regular there. They usually give me two fortune cookies to go along with my ‘Lunch Special’. Later tonight I’ll have your special ‘double feature’ edition of ‘The Fortune Cookie Message Of The Week Club’. Don’t miss it !

3.  Earlier today I went to annualcreditreport.com and I printed out three full and complete credit reports for me from Equifax, Experian, and TransUnion. annualcreditreport.com is the only site that is legally able to give you free copies of your credit report from all three of those credit bureau sites. I did all of this in less than 45 minutes this morning, and I got over 30 pages of important credit information spanning virtually my entire adult life.

4.  I thrive in a hot and humid environment (such as Homestead). I could not live happily ever after in a cold and dry environment - or a hot and dry environment for that matter. It’s hotter in San Antonio (where I’ll be next week) than it is here in Homestead, but it’s less humid over there than it is over here. I’d rather have the extra humidity rather than the higher temperatures.

5.  I’ve become a semi-regular of the new Starbucks in Homestead. The people that work there are now starting to recognize me and my car. So far I have received consistent great service from them - inside as well as via their drive-thru. Let’s hope that it stays that way.

6.  The following 5 things kept me preoccupied for 7 hours yesterday at my Saturn dealership in Cutler Bay:
a.  My iPod Shuffle
b.  The latest edition of ‘Entertainment Weekly‘ (magazine)
c.  The Miami Herald (newspaper)
d.  TV Guide Crosswords & Sudokus
e.  Life Pointe Church follow-up spreadsheet (printed out)

7.  Some people have a chronic addiction to their cell phone. They just can’t stop calling people all over the free nation and sharing their private lives in public via their loud cell phone conversations. No wonder identity theft exists. Remember the good old days when telephone conversations were done in private inside the home ?

8.  Homestead Trivia - How many miles apart are Speedway Boulevard (SW 137TH Avenue) and Krome Avenue (SW 177TH Avenue) ?  The answer - exactly 4.0 miles. In Miami-Dade County each numbered avenue is exactly 0.1 miles apart to the grid. 40 avenues apart = 4.0 miles. It’s that simple my friends !

9.  Me, My Brother, His Wife, & Fuddruckers - That’s the plan for Lunch as soon as I touch down in the Dallas-Fort Worth Metroplex this Saturday. After that we will all go and play a round of minature golf. I totally dig that plan !

10.  Next week your ‘Tuesday Night Grab Bag O’ Thoughts’ will come to you LIVE from the River Walk in San Antonio. I’m also planning at least a couple of special editions of ‘The Major’s Walk-A-Thon’. You’re not gonna wanna miss it my friends.

You waited 168 hours for this ?  Let’s see if it was all worth it.

1.  Last week was the biggest week in history for this blog. Nowadays we are averaging more than double the amount of unique hits to this blog in a typical Monday to Sunday week than we were less than 3 months ago. Today (Tuesday) became the biggest Tuesday ever in the history of this blog before I even turned on my computer this afternoon !  THANK YOU FRIENDS !

2.  Speaking of friends Pastor Travis called me ‘clueless’ in his blog today, and it’s the nicest complement I’ve received all day. I’ll accept the complement because I did a much better job late last night before I went to sleep talking all about Trav to God. Trav is one of the most sensible persons that I have ever met in my entire life / Life.

3.  Paul - There’s no need to be jealous. The person that was going to take me out to Lunch for my birthday today fell ill and had to postpone it, so I ended up eating ‘grocery store grub’ from Publix. Actually it was rather decent tasty - chicken tenders, macaroni and cheese, and juicy corn. YUM !

4.  Yesterday (Monday) I went to Panda Express (spur-of-the-moment decision) for Lunch and I received poor service. As usual they had little to no selection of foods available to choose from for the various entrees. I completed and submitted a survey online stating my dissatisfaction with their Lunch service and product. We’ll see if it gets any better in future visits. If the customer service and the food selection doesn’t improve then I’ll just stop going there.

5.  Speaking of the Atlanta Bread Company in Homestead I have received no follow-up communication from Corporate Headquarters in Smyrna Georgia as of yet - more than 80 hours after the fact. Apparently they have no Assimilation / Follow-Up Director.

6.  I was extremely shy as a kid. I didn’t talk a lot. The reason why is because when I did talk nobody was listening and nobody cared to listen. I pretty much lived through a sad and miserable childhood. My little brother was one of the first persons in my entire life that actually listened to what I had to say and was genuinely interested. If it weren’t for my little brother then I may not be here today.

7.  One of the highlights of my day is looking out my personal hurricane-proof window at work that faces due east and watching the sun rise above the horizon. I adore the daylight. I adore chasing it. It’s morning again !

8.  I spent close to 45 minutes at Office Max yesterday and I only spent $8.75 (including tax). The fact of the matter is that I could have spent 3 hours browsing around in that store and $500 or more on quality office merchandise. But I showed real restraint in there. I’m a member of the Christian Conservative Coalition. Yeah - I’m one of those wackos - and PROUD of it !

9.  When Staples opens its doors for business later this year over at the MASSIVE new Homestead Pavilion shopping, dining, and entertainment complex I may hang out there like I own the place !  I’m crazy about office supplies like that.

10.  Exactly 5 months ago this morning - on January 03RD 2008 - Homestead was shivering just a few degrees above the freezing mark. It was in the 30s outside for 8 hours, and in the 40s for an additional 8 hours. It was our coldest morning in nearly 12 years !  I just wanted to remind you of that now that we’re clearly in the bug-infested hot and humid summertime rainy season.

I went to the Atlanta Bread Company here in Homestead this morning, and for the 2ND time and 2ND Saturday morning visit in exactly 7 weeks I received NO customer service and NO food even though I was in the store for over 15 minutes !

That’s as far as I’ll discuss about this particular experience here on this blog. I have already written and submitted a comment online about the specific details of this morning’s experience to Corporate Headquarters in Smyrna Georgia. I do not plan to visit this store location again anytime soon.

Knowing full well that my overall experiences (about a half a dozen of them) at the Atlanta Bread Company have been far below average I already had a back-up plan in mind, and so after I stormed out of there this morning I enacted ‘Plan B’ by heading over to Publix (where shopping is a pleasure) to release my frustrations by buying food and groceries. (That always seems to do the trick.) I then slipped in to McDonald’s to buy a cheap breakfast (including their # 1 rated coffee). Good Stuff !

… And so those are my ‘Saturday Morning Shenanigans’ …

901-213-2895

Apparently I’m not alone.

I’m really not alone.

For real.

1.  I’m starting this week’s ‘Tuesday Night Grab Bag O’ Thoughts’ at 6:21 PM. That’s the latest that I think I’ve ever started it. I just got home from a long 12-hour day of work here and here.

2.  Jesse says that there’s one Mexican restaurant in particular that serves their food above all of the rest, and that’s really saying something for a place like Homestead where there’s a Mexican restaurant on practically every other block. Maybe one day Jesse will take his closest friends (including me) over to this place to experience the real deal.

3.  Jesse also says that Hooters makes some of the best wings in the free nation. Since I don’t go to Hooters I encouraged Jesse to go out and get us a whole bunch of those amazing wings and then bring them back home to Homestead to share with his closest friends (including me).

4.  Google may be the runaway # 1 smash Internet search engine in the universe, but I hardly ever use it. I prefer Yahoo. I’ve always been a fan of Yahoo - even before it became a household name.

5.  Lysol disinfectant kills viruses, bacteria, mold, and mildew. It kills 99.9% of germs in 30 seconds. I know a whole bunch of public places in and around Homestead that could use a good soaking of Lysol daily !  I wonder what’s the deal with the remaining 0.1% of germs. Does Lysol kill them as well, but it just takes longer than 30 seconds ?

6.  A lot of great pop music came out during the Summer of 1998. I just took a look at my # 1 hits from my once successful music web site during June, July, August, and September of exactly a decade ago, and it brought back a lot of good times and memories from that era. I think I hung out with my little brother a lot during that fun Summer.

7.  I’ll be hanging out with my little brother in just about a month at the River Walk en San Antonio. I’m looking forward to it. It’ll never be as good as ‘the good old days’, but it’ll still be good enough. Any time with my little brother is precious time.

8.  I hope that John McCain selects Mike Huckabee as his running mate, but the fact of the matter is that I will vote for John McCain no matter who he selects as his Vice Presidential running mate.

9.  I prefer paper clips over staples. That reminds me. I need to get on over to Office Depot to buy some more paper clips of assorted shapes and sizes.

10.  I’m ending this week’s ‘Tuesday Night Grab Bag O’ Thoughts’ at 7:12 PM. It took me less than an hour to come up with everything that you just read within this blog entry. That’s how spontaneous this is. I had nothing before I started, and now I have this creation. I created this masterpiece, and I used the skills that were provided to be by my Creator - the Creator of all things that exist - God. He’s good like that. He’s amazing like that. There is no one and no thing that is greater than Him !

B U G S - The bugs are back in town here in Homestead due to all of the recent heavy rains. You may be thinking to yourself, ‘Hey - Wait a minute. I live in Homestead. It hasn’t rained since March !’  You may also be thinking to yourself, ‘No doubt. I thought the sky was caving in on us yesterday afternoon. My yard turned into a giant lake !  My new patio furniture was thrown by the funnel cloud into the canal !’ There is rain all around us. Some of us have received a lot of it this past week, and some of us are still living in a dust bowl. Pretty soon all of us will get a lot of rain, and the bugs will flock to Homestead on their Summer break. Get ready to be eaten alive by little itsy-bitsy teeny-weeny mouths with glow-in-the-dark green eyes.

G A S - I filled-up my car this morning with not quite 11 gallons of gas at Chevron on Useless-One at Campbell Drive at the remarkable price of $4.059 per gallon. That’s about 15 to 20 cents per gallon higher than every other gas station in the general vicinity of that Chevron, but I am kinda sorta semi-loyal to Chevron, and I really wanted to use my fresh new Chevron-Texaco credit card this morning for the first time. $4.059 may seem outrageous to a majority of whining and complaining Americans, but $4.059 for the equivalent of a gallon of gas anywhere in Europe is known as ‘the good old days of the 1990s’.

J A V A - Speaking of items that we Americans love to spend a lot of money on - Starbucks in Homestead - not to be confused with Starbucks in Florida City - is OPEN for BUSINESS !  OK calm down Travis. The drive-thru is open for business. The inside of the joint is apparently not quite ready for customer utilization, so you’ll just have to wait a little while longer to sit inside for hours on your wireless Apple Mac.

One final item of interest - Many of the mega-stores and restaurants at the first phase of the Homestead Pavilion shopping, dining, and entertainment complex at Campbell Drive and the Turnpike are expected to make their grand openings between the middle of October and the middle of November - just in time for the NASCAR Championship Series at the Homestead-Miami Speedway and of course the Christmas 2008 shopping season.

The legend continues, as we enter the 8TH month of these ‘Tuesday Night Grab Bag O’ Thoughts’:

1. Travis sent me an ‘Untwitter’ (an ordinary cell phone text message) shortly before 2 PM from my favourite Chinese restaurant aqui en Homestead. Apparently he’s eatin’ good in the neighbourhood at the Peking House. NICE !

2.  I’m a ‘Law & Order’ type of guy - not the actual TV shows, but the simple Life concept of law and order. I wouldn’t survive in a world of anarchy and chaos.

3.  Just in time for the long Memorial Day holiday weekend - we may actually experience the effects of an extremely rare cold front here in South Florida with cool and gusty northeasterly winds coming straight off of the ocean and afternoon high temperatures struggling to get past the 80°F mark. Look for it (potentially) on Sunday and Memorial Day Monday.

4.  Tomorrow (Wednesday) is the last official day of the 2007-2008 television season. It will forever be remembered as the season that the 100-day writers’ strike interrupted. It also continued a trend in which prime time network television viewership hit all-new record lows.

5.  I have so many exciting ideas floating around in my brain for Life Pointe Church. Some of these ideas will never see the light of the day, but I think that most of them will in some way either sooner or later. I’m not alone. I hang out every Sunday morning with a whole bunch of my friends who serve, praise, worship, and love Him. They have some really cool ideas for their church. These are our future leaders at the LPC. We are going to spread the Kingdom of God here in South Miami-Dade !

6.  You think I’m old-fashioned ?  This morning I personally witnessed a late-50s-something guy (a co-worker of mine) rockin’ an electric typewriter like it’s 1972 !  He felt right at home on that thing !

7.  Speaking of the early-1970s I had two dogs when I was a little kid. Brandy was a German Shepherd, and Girlie was a sheep dog. Brandy was taken away from me in 1973 because she was digging holes underneath the backyard fence, crawling under it, and then running loose and terrorizing the neighbourhood. Girlie was taken away from me in 1975 because I was allegedly not taking care of her - as a 7-year-old. The real reason why she was yanked away from me is because of the impending arrival of my little brother.

8.  The people that complain the loudest about the rising gas prices are usually the people that waste the most gas with their lousy driving habits. Don’t throw stones at the oil man when you live in a glass house.

9.  I would see Neil Diamond LIVE in concert. Go ahead. Make fun of me.

10.  Florida Power & Light should have a roving team of technicians that fix street lights that don’t work properly. If you’re wondering why there are no lights on late at night or early in the morning on selected streets it’s because they may be on all day long instead. Sometimes it takes FPL several months to the greater part of a year to find out about these malfunctioning lights and then correct the problem. You can help them out by reporting these street lights via their official web site.

Last week on the ‘Thursday Night Internet Hoax Hall-Of-Shame’ we exposed a developing hoax in which an E-Mail states that a list of businesses have filed for bankruptcy, so you best run don’t walk to those places ASAP to use your gift cards for them before they become worthless. The list (naturally) includes stores that have not filed for bankruptcy, and future variations of the E-Mail are expected to include even more stores that have not filed for bankruptcy.

An Internet hoax is like gossip. It evolves as it expands.

This week on the ‘Hall-Of-Shame’ it’s all about an E-Mail that’s currently circulating all over the world accusing gas stations of intentionally cheating at their gas pumps by showing more gallons of gas being pumped than what is actually being received by the vehicle (thus inflating the overall cost of the fill-up).

You’re not gonna believe what your local gas station may (or may not) be doing to you right before your very eyes. Grab your crew and be sure to catch this EXPLOSIVE edition of the ‘Thursday Night Internet Hoax Hall-Of-Shame’. It goes LIVE here on the blog shortly after 5 PM EDT here on the U.S. East Coast. You’re not gonna wanna miss it !

Greetings Friends & Bloggers. It’s time for the Wednesday night edition of ‘Bedtime Stories’.

This is the final blog entry for tonight - and for this month of April 2008. This was the biggest month in our history as far as unique views were concerned. In fact we totally shattered the previous record for the biggest month - March 2008 - by more than 20% !  That’s EXPLOSIVE growth month-to-month for this blog, and it’s all because of you - the loyal and faithful viewer that checks out what’s going on here every day and comments when appropriate. Thank you all for your support !

Besides tomorrow being the first day of May (’May Day’) it’s also a Thursday, so it’s time for another eye-popping edition of the fastest-growing weekly series here on this blog - the ‘Thursday Night Internet Hoax Hall-Of-Shame’. I’ll be posting a couple of SHOCKING pictures that you’re just not going to believe. But millions of people all around the world did believe. Is it deja vu ?  Have you seen these pictures before ?  I’m pretty sure that some of you have, but it’s where you’ve seen them before that will leave you totally stunned. Be sure to catch it tomorrow afternoon shortly after 4 PM.

May you have a safe, peaceful, and blessed Wednesday night with your loved ones - even if your all alone, and your loved one is God. You may be alone, but with Him in your Life you are never ever lonely. He is everywhere that you need Him to be. Love Him and Worship Him above everyone and everything else.

Until we hang out again here on the blog remember this:

You know why you’re here:

1.  Some of the best television programming on-the-air is in the form of 30 and 60 second commercials. You know that it’s a great commercial when you pretty much stop what you’re doing whenever it comes on the tube - no matter how many times you’ve already seen it. I’m thinking about the AT&T GoPhone commercial right now that stars Meat Loaf and Tiffany. (NO - The’re not really married in real-life. That’s not really their son either.)

2.  The sight of a large gathering of people applauding President George W. Bush after a speech is a beautiful sight. The concept of everyone respecting The President Of The United States Of America (whoever it is), and treating him or her like you would want to be treated by any other human being is just plain humane. Unfortunately it’s a concept that millions of Americans just don’t understand.

3.  I think that I totally adore eating Kellogg’s Pop Tarts today just as much as I did as a kid back in the 1970s into the 1980s. I think that if you ask me about them again in another 30 years then the answer will probably be the same.

4.  On the other hand back in the 1970s I did not appreciate Chinese food. In fact I didn’t really enjoy eating it on a regular basis until the mid-1990s. Homestead has no shortage of family-owned Chinese restaurants. Everywhere you look - ‘There’s one !’

5.  Homestead also specializes in family-owned Mexican restaurants, and that’s a delicacy that’s even newer to my personal tastes than Chinese food. One day soon I’m going to have Lunch with this cat at a fine Mexican restaurant near my workplace.

6.  If there are just 3 motorists driving along a somewhat secluded portion of highway in Homestead then those 3 motorists would just have to be myself, the slow-poke directly in front of me that’s driving 33 MPH in a 40 MPH zone, and the tail-gater directly behind me that is so close that I can no longer see his or her vehicle anymore via my rear-view mirror. Throw in an extra-special 4TH vehicle that’s rapidly approaching all 3 of us with its high-beams on, and you’ve got a typical Tuesday morning on North Canal Drive in Homestead !

7.  Incidentally Miami-Dade County’s SW 328TH Street is known as ‘North Canal Drive’ for 7½-miles from Homestead Bayfront Park westward to the city limits of Florida City at SW 172ND Avenue. At that exact point SW 328TH Street is renamed ‘Lucy Street’, and it is the dividing line between Homestead (on the north) and Florida City (on the south). It has been that way since the 1940s. If you’re coming out of the Villages Of Homestead then you are making a turn onto ‘North Canal Drive’ - not ‘Lucy Street’.

8.  I had planned to go to Publix this afternoon after work to buy some much-needed groceries, but then I decided against it on the way home because I have way too many things to do - such as compiling and publishing these ‘Tuesday Night Grab Bag O’ Thoughts’. It’s all about the sacrifices that I make for you - my loyal and faithful friend of this blog.

9.  I was referred to as ‘Pastor Chris’ a couple of times last week at the Exponential Conference in Orlando. I think it was because in some of the breakout sessions that I attended it was mostly all Pastors (and me). Unlike the Catholic Church Pastors tend to look and dress rather normal - just like you and me.

10.  My fingernails grow so fast. It seems like I just clipped them a few days ago, and now they need clipping again. That’s another 5 minutes out of my busy schedule !

Sky: Partly Cloudy
Temperature: 73°F
Relative Humidity: 87%
Winds: Calm
Barometric Pressure: 29.99 Rising

My thoughts:

1.  This morning’s walk began a full 25 minutes before sunrise right at the start of civil twilight. I wanted to get a head start before the Sun heated up the environment.

2.  This was the longest ‘Walk-A-Thon’ ever - over 2.2 miles according to my good friends over there at Google Earth. It took me just shy of 42 minutes to walk the walk. I averaged PI (3.14) MPH. I’ve made considerable progress since those 25-minute 1.3-mile walks of January. It’s a fantastic journey all around and throughout my neighborhood on God’s fantastic journey.

3.  No ducks were harmed on this morning’s walk, and I was not scared either. They minded their own business, and so did I. The’re good like that !

4.  This was intended as the ‘Spring Season Finale’ of ‘The Major’s Walk-A-Thon’; however, as long as temperatures remain below 75°F early on a Saturday morning I will probably continue the momentum. The Summer hiatus of this walk may have been greatly exaggerated.

5.  After the walk I drove over to The Atlanta Bread Company to eat a MASSIVE breakfast (planned in advance by studying their menu earlier this morning at home). Unfortunately it appeared that The Atlanta Bread Company had gone out of business, or perhaps they were robbed, or maybe they were recovering from a fire overnight. I didn’t really know for sure because they were CLOSED for business a full hour after their scheduled opening time !  The doors were locked shut, and there was no sign on the doors to alert their customers as to why they were closed. I had no backup plan (my bad), so I spontaneously decided to get on Florida’s Turnpike southbound, head into Florida City, and pick-up a fast food breakfast at Arby’s. It just wasn’t the same, but it was OK I suppose.

FOOTNOTE:  Upon further review The Atlanta Bread Company actually does not open for business until 8 AM on Saturday mornings (as per their official web site). This contradicts the 6:30 AM opening time that is posted on their take-out menu.  

It’s time for the Sunday night edition of ‘Bedtime Stories’ - brought to you by Puffs.

Another 7-day week has concluded here on this blog, and it was the 2ND busiest week in our WordPress history based on total views. It was the busiest Monday in 5 weeks, the 2ND busiest Friday of 2008, the busiest Saturday ever, and the 3RD busiest Sunday of 2008. It was the busiest Thursday / Friday / Saturday / Sunday 4-day period ever!  Thank You Everyone for reading this blog on a regular basis !

I’ve got what appears to be my unprecedented 3RD cold in less than 5 months. Once upon a time I used to get a cold about once every 18 months to 3 years. Of course that was back when I was a plastic mannequin. This past Friday night I was amongst an estimated 5,000 to 9,000 adults, teens, and kids at the ‘Moonlight Easter Egg Hunt‘ at Harris Field, and on this glorious Easter Sunday morning there were over 700 of us at the movie theatre for Life Pointe Church services. I was shaking hands and hugging people all over the place this morning, and now I have a head cold. Go figure !

I’ve already E-Mailed in sick to work for tomorrow. I think that it’s best for me to sleep-in tomorrow morning and feel better before I go back to work (hopefully on Tuesday morning).

So until you hear from me again here on the blog please pray that I feel better soon. Oh yeah, and remember this:

Puffs:  A nose in need deserves Puffs indeed.

Have a safe and peaceful night everyone. Good Night Venus.

Location - Stopped at the traffic light in the right-hand lane eastbound on Biscayne Drive (SW 288TH St.) at Speedway Boulevard (SW 137TH Ave.) right at the northern city limits of Homestead. (This is one of the most dangerous intersections in the Homestead area.)

Scenario - This car driven by an apparent female with dark sunglasses on while talking on a cell phone approaches my car from the rear, and decides that she can’t wait for the light to turn green so that I can proceed through the intersection on my way back to the base. She proceeds to pull in to the empty middle lane, and then make a right-hand turn into Homestead (without stopping no doubt) while missing hitting the front of my car by less than a foot. A couple of seconds later the light turned green, and I proceeded forward.

My Thoughts - This is a lady with no patience who was obviously in a hurry to get somewhere in Homestead real fast with no regard at all to common courtesy, safety, or the law. If she continues to drive like that then she will probably become a sad statistic.

I drove about 200 miles today from Homestead to Fort Myers via Florida’s Turnpike and I-75. Here are just a few thoughts of my trip today:

1.  This is the first time since the day after Thanksgiving that I have been further north of SW 184TH Street and U.S. 1 in Palmetto Bay. I need to get out more often.

2.  When the Florida Highway Patrol is by the side of the road either with their radar gun pointed out or attending to a motorist that’s already been pulled over all I see are bright red tail-lights as my fellow motorists slam on their brakes from their cruising speeds of 80, 85, 90, or more MPH down to below the posted speed limit. Meanwhile my foot remains on the gas pedal because I’m already at the posted speed limit. I’m a law-abiding motorist - even when the FHP is not watching me.

3.  20 years ago I-75 in western Broward County was a wide-open Interstate in the middle of nowhere. It was an oasis of empty pavement. My how things have changed since then !

4.  Two lanes in each direction is severely insufficient for I-75 traffic between Naples and Fort Myers. If it gets anymore congested then people are going to start driving on the grass. 

5.  U.S. 41 in Fort Myers (Tamiami Trail) looks a lot like U.S. 1 in South Miami-Dade. Edison Mall kinda looks like Southland Mall.

214-283-1316 - DALLAS TEXAS

I’m not alone. Check out this long list of complaints or this long list of complaints regarding calls from this specific telephone number.

‘The Road Rage Files’ is not just about bad drivers. It’s also about irresponsible and inconsiderate drivers.

This is now the 15TH day in a row in which we have received absolutely no rain whatsoever (0.00) here in the Homestead area. Since November 01ST not even an inch and a quarter of rain has fallen. We are bone dry. We are now a desert !

Now that we know the obvious can you please tell me why drivers are still throwing objects that are on fire out of their moving vehicles ?  You are creating brush fires all around us !  We’ve currently got winds gusting in excess of 25 MPH. What you throw out the window (on fire) is setting the surrounding grass and brush on fire. Homestead ARB was socked-in with thick dense low-lying smoke this afternoon because of a wild brush fire just north of the base.

STOP STARTING FIRES !  Keep the garbage in your vehicle !

703-378-7296 - HERNDON VIRGINIA

I’m not alone. Check out this long list of complaints or this long list of complaints regarding calls from this specific telephone number.

Get ready for the ‘triple-trifecta’ of Homestead’s worst drivers - caught on tape memory !

INCIDENT # 1
YESTERDAY afternoon while driving southbound on Homestead’s Speedway Boulevard between Mowry Drive and North Canal Drive I was driving peacefully in the right-hand lane when I saw a vehicle in my rear-view mirror rapidly approaching me from the rear. The driver was speeding out-of-control. At the last possible second the driver eased over into the left-hand lane (not completely), passed me, and then began easing back into the right-hand lane before he / she had even cleared my car. If there were three yardsticks attached to my car -  one each behind, to the side, and in front of it - all three of them would have been snapped off by this vehicle - one right after the other.

INCIDENT # 2
THIS afternoon while driving westbound on Biscayne Drive I was passed as if I were sitting still. The driver then eased on over to my lane, and got in the turning lane onto southbound Speedway Boulevard. The light was red. When the protected green arrow light came on he / she just sat there and ignored it. By the time he / she realized it the light had already turned into a yellow arrow. He / She proceeded through the dangerous intersection, and I followed closely behind him / her (with no more protected light). I barely made it onto Speedway Boulevard without getting hit by oncoming eastbound Biscayne Drive traffic. If you’re speeding out-of-control then pay attention when the light turns green so that you can get right back to your speeding out-of-control again. You are obviously in a hurry, so GO when the light turns GREEN !

INCIDENT # 3
The traffic light at the busy Homestead intersection of Kingman Road and North Canal Drive was on the ‘blink’ bright and early this morning. It was flashing yellow for North Canal Drive traffic, and flashing red for Kingman Road traffic. As I passed through it (with no traffic at 5:50 AM) the first thought that came to my mind was that there would be numerous accidents here if they didn’t get that light fixed pronto. This afternoon as I approached the intersection the Homestead Police Department was in full control of it waving motorists through - and around the fire engines, ambulances, police cars, mangled-up vehicles, and scattered debris in the roadway as a result of a bad accident (or two) there. Someone(s) obviously didn’t have a clue that a flashing red light means to come to a complete stop, look both ways, and then proceed when there is no traffic coming.

It is now time for one of your favourite regular features here on ‘The Major’s Life Blog’, and that of course would be the continuing mini-series that is ‘The Fortune Cookie Message Of The Week Club’.

But first this is ‘Today’ on NBC.

Actually let me rant for a minute here about a pet-peeve of mine. I arrived at Panda Express at 11:07 AM. They are supposed to open at 11:00 AM. ‘Supposed’ is the key word here. I’ve forgiven the fact that during the Lunch hour they typically have an extremely limited selection as part of their a-la-carte menu. I’m sure that they have a much bigger selection of delicious food items available for consumption later on in the day. I just wish I knew what they tasted like. I can’t forgive the fact that when they (or any restaurant for that matter) are supposed to be open for business at a certain time they are actually not so. Doors locked. No notice. No nothing. I took my business elsewhere. It may be awhile before I visit them again for Lunch. My time is precious.

I instead proceeded to Homestead’s # 1 place for Chinese Food, Fun, Music, and Authentic Kitchen Arguments In Chinese. Yes - You guessed it - It’s the Peking House !

I enjoyed a MASSIVE selection of Lunch items - all-you-can-eat-’boofay’-style. It was all good. I walked away very happy … and full !

Today’s fortune cookie message is as cool as two of my former house cats (Fluffy and Boots):

‘Your maintain a sense of balance in the midst of great success.’

It’s grammatically incorrect; however, it’s right on the mark. But it hasn’t always been that way for me. I’ve had great success in the past (and couldn’t handle it effectively), and I’ve had great failures as well (and didn’t know how to get out of it). With God as my Director I can now deal with both success and failure appropriately. I’m learning from both scenarios. It’s not effective to dwell on either. It’s beneficial to constantly look forward and move forward on this journey - never accepting the status quo or what’s average. It’s all about doing what’s good and right - striving for success and not allowing failure to but the brakes on progress.

734-542-7758 - MARKET STRATEGIES - MICHIGAN

I’m not alone. Check out this long list of complaints or this long list of complaints regarding calls from this specific telephone number.